Dear Thomas part IV: Kiss from Boy to boy

Dear diary:

                My mother woke me up.
                I was tired. Last night I had to wait for my brothers to come back because my mother was exhausted and she wanted to sleep. My considered brothers came back early (like at 3 o'clock in the morning). So I slept only three hours. "Great! Wonderful!"
                After taking a shower I checked out my cell phone. It had a message from Thomas:
                “You know where I wait for you.”
                “Shit!” I thought. My sister was late (again). So I rushed up and didn’t tell her a thing about my meeting with the “pretty” guy.
                “Were the fuck are my things?”  I thought while I was dipping in my closet for something nice to wear. "Yes! Here they are!" my jeans.
                I got in my jeans and put on a nice shirt. "Damn! Where are my sneakers?" I ran through the entire house looking for them and found them under my bed. "Dah!"
                After that, I went to the table and quickly prepare a sandwich that I ate in seconds, then I brush my teeth and left the house while I shouted "You're too slow! I'm leaving without you!" After that, I ran as fast as I could and reach the bus stop.
                He was there, standing in the sidewalk looking at his watch with his melancholic face.

- Good morning! – I said while I tried to give him a smile.

- Hi! – He said with a wide open smile which was as bright as the sun when he saw me.

                We shook hands.

- So, what do we have at first hour? – He asked.

- I guess we have math. But I’m not sure. –

               Then the bus arrived. We sat down and started looking through the window. That day was cold again and had a cloudy aspect, the one that makes you think it’s about to rain.
                Then I remembered: “I have taken the first jacket I saw, the one that belongs to Thomas.”

- I’m sorry. – I said. – This is your jacket. –

                I was about to take it off when he interrupted me.

- Keep it. It’s a present. – He said.

- Are you nuts? It’s beautiful. –

- You need it. And it seems that you remembered to wear it. –

- Yeah. But… -

- We don’t want a sick Brian. Do we? – He said that while he passed his hand through my cheek in a softly and gentle way.

                I looked through the window turning aside my eyes.
                Why do I feel so nervous around him? He has a strange way of looking and talking to me. Why do I feel uncomfortable because I'm feeling comfortable when I'm with him? Yeah. All right! This has been in my mind for some days and I have thought it, but I haven't wanted to write it. I have had the feeling that Thomas is maybe... How can I say it? Hem, I think that Thomas is maybe attracted to me. I don't know in what way, but he seems to have a strange interest for me. For example, I don't think he acts with other guys as he acts with me. He is more gentle when he is with me, and even more gentle when he is with nobody else. Maybe it is his way of letting me know he wants us to be friends. I don't know. But strangely, it doesn't bother me. In fact, I like when he is sensible, not like all the boys. I know it sounds pretty gay. Anyway, having a diary it can be really gay. But is the only method I have to express myself in a private way.

- Are you all right? – He said to me.

               I nodded my head expressing a “yes”. I was just lost in my thoughts, and his question took me by surprise.

- Well, we have arrived. – He smiled at me as if I was a little kid.

                We left the bus and opened the front door. As we passed through the hallway some people stared at me. Thomas is the center of attention wherever he is. I have to get accustomed to that if I’m going to be around him all the time.
                We get to our lockers and our worlds were divided again.
                Jenny came to me and Trevor walked with Daniel to meet Thomas.

- So. Have you two talked about meeting some day after school? –

- Nope. – I lied. I prefer to make this meeting as a secret or my brain will melt with too many indications on what to do, say or wear.

- So what are you waiting for? The guy will get bored waiting for you. – She laughed.

               We walked together to Mrs. Wright class and after those 15 minutes we went to math class.
               The day passed rapidly. There isn’t too much to tell. At lunch I sat with the girls because Thomas was too busy sitting with “The Three” (Daniel, Trevor and Sam).

- Thomas has beautiful Spanish accent. – said Kristine.

               She is jenny’s best friend. The two of them are inseparable. I can admit I’m a little bit jealous of Kristine. She can share many topics with jenny that I don’t have a clue about, so when they are together I feel a little bit remote.

- Yeah! I almost fainted when I listened to him talking that way. – said the blond girl. (Oh. I haven’t written it? Jenny has a shiny, soft and long blond hair.)

- It's fantastic to have the same schedule that Thomas. - said Kris.

- So that way you can have a nice view all day long. -

- Blah-blah-blah. - I said. - You two seem Thomas's number one fans. - And I laugh.

                The two of them laugh and continued moving their mouth in honor to Thomas.
                I stopped paying attention to their conversation and looked to the table where Thomas was sitting. He was looking at me, but he soon moved away his head and laugh about what Trevor was saying. The room was too noisy so I couldn't hear what Trevor said.
"Was he saying something about me?" I thought. "It all fits. That's why Thomas was looking at me. What were they talking about? Maybe Thomas is getting close to me to mock me behind my back. No! He is too nice to do such things. Maybe Thomas is not as perfect as he seems to be. Ok stop thinking about it." I thought while I finished my dessert.
                But I could not stop, in fact I thought about it all English class.
                After English we had orientation. At this class (last period on Thursdays) we talked about some sexual diseases. Trevor made his usual jokes, some girls blushed, and the guys were joking to hide they were ashamed. I was just in silence paying attention to that horrible combination of colors on Mr. Parker's cloth.
                When the class finished I run to my locker. All I wanted was to get soon at home to finish my homework and help my mom at the kitchen. Today was my turn to do the things at the house and apart from that I had school work. "Thank God!" I thought sarcastically.
                I was running to pass the front door when someone pulled my arm.

- You thought you were leaving without me?-

                “Oh no. He is the only one who can stop me. Why? Why today?”

- No. I’m just in a rush today. –

- Aha? Well so I won’t stop you. – He said.

- But there is no problem. I have time. – “today I only have time for you.”

               Why did I think that? It's like the most stupid thing I have ever thought. It is very namby-pamby and besides, the person has not even listened to what you said. Think it is more namby-pamby that saying it. But is very comfortable to know that you are the only one that knows what you have thought.

               We started walking home.

- Why were you so hurried? –

- is my turn to do things at home. – I said.

- I can help you if you want. – He offered me kindly.

- Don't worry. I can do it alone. - "My house is little, and now is a mess." I thought.

-OK. But anyway, I want to walk to your home. I don't know where you live. -

- No problem. -

               We walked in silence. I don't know why, but every walk I have with Thomas is always in silence. It doesn't mind at all, it's a nice gesture and we didn't seem force to start the conversation. It is relaxing to have someone near you that is not shocked about the silence.                               
               Maybe I haven't written this, but I'm a silent person. Yeah, I write a lot you may think, But that's because I would not regret on what I write because it's easier to burn a notebook than saying sorry to someone because you said something rude.

- Well, this is my house. -

- It looks really nice and welcoming. - He said observing it with admiration. - I am going now. I won't take away more of your time. -

- See you then. - I said. "I really want to see you again." I thought. "Oh no! Stop doing that! It is really annoying."

               He stepped forward to me and came down a little bit so we were facing to face. I can tell I was scared. "Is he going to kiss me?" I thought a little bit shocked.
               And then, In a quit movement, but soft as cotton, he kissed my cheek.

- See you. - He said with a deep and soft voice, then he started walking home.

               I stood there for a while. I was relieved that he didn't kiss me. Although it was strange that a guy kissed your cheek in a goodbye and loving gesture.

               "Why did he do that?"

               I opened the front door of my house.
               I finished my tasks.
               Now that I'm sitting on my bed I can tell that the lunch situation and this last thing that happened with Thomas has a direct relation.
               Maybe Thomas is acting that way to make fun at me. Anyway, tomorrow I have a "date" (I laughed when I wrote this). I will continue being Thomas "friend" until I'm 100% sure that he has bad intentions in his actions.
               Write you next day.